Tag Archives: sharyn hayden

Resource: Help My Kid Learn

Help My Kid LearnI am ALWAYS on the lookout for tips on things to do with Jacob at home – especially on those days when it’s either pouring down outside OR you’ve got a sick child and can’t leave the house OR you’re wrecked and can’t bear to leave the house one way or the other. He totally gets cabin fever just like the rest of us so a planned activity at home can really break up the afternoon.

Then of course there are the weekends and mid terms and days off and holidays to fill with as much fun as possible (phew!), so I was delighted to come across the this online resource to help me with some cool ideas.

Help My Kid Learn is a website developed by the National Adult Literacy Agency (NALA). It promotes family literacy by giving parents, guardians and family members fun ideas to help build their child’s literacy and numeracy skills. The activities range from traditional games and activities to suggested online games and apps and are aimed at kids from age 0 to age 12. You don’t have to register, and it is totally free. On the website you can sign up for a monthly online newsletter to keep you up to date with new items on the website, or like them on Facebook

Baby Sign Language Is Coming To Rush!

SuperHands Baby  Sign Language

SuperHands Baby
Sign Language

My good pal Miriam is the founder and owner of SuperHands Baby Sign Language (we have a cool post and video all about it here!).

She and I only met after Jacob had begun to speak but I wished we’d met before. You see, Jacob really, REALLY wanted to tell us stuff all the time, he wanted us to understand what he wanted, between the ages of 9 months and 1 and a half. But he couldn’t speak yet. So as we stared at him quizzically when he made attempts to speak, and didn’t have a clue what he wanted, he got really frustrated and really mad. And I don’t blame him. Knowing what you want to say but not having the words to say it must suck.

(Anyhow, we persevered, and now he just has tantrums about pretty much everything else).

But SuperHands Baby Sign Language could have helped with all of that frustration, had I known about it sooner and so I am determined to try it out this time with Eva. And for the first time ever, classes are available in my hometown of Rush!! Whoppee!

The course begins on March 12th in the Community Centre and here are some of the benefits to you and your baby:

1. It gets you out of the house with your baby for a structured activity.
2. It increases the bond between you and your baby by spending quality time interacting with them – giving you a better understanding of your baby’s wants, needs and personality.
3. Accelerates communication – babies start to babble more and attempt to communicate more regularly.
4. You get to meet lots of lovely, like-minded parents in a relaxed environment.
5. Baby really enjoys the class as there are lots of age-appropriate toys and musical instruments, and they love the songs and poems.
6. You get to learn lots of new nursery rhymes and poems as well as practicing those long-forgotten ones from your childhood.
7. It’s a lot of fun!

The 6-week course is €100 and includes a bright and colourful illustrated dictionary of baby sign language and a CD of songs and poems to sign to.

See you there? OH YES! The booking info is right HERE.

[SuperHands founder Miriam Devitt also wrote a piece for us on Infant Communication that you should totally check out]

Breastfeeding, but not breast-feeding. Another Option!

After last weekends’ Great Twitter Chat on my ‘Breastfeeding: A Pain In The Tits?’ article, I can’t stop talking about it to everyone I meet. Most women are in agreement that whether you or I breast or bottle feed our kids is nobody else’s business, and everyone just needs to get on with their own lives. BUT, there was a definite sentiment amongst many of the women I spoke to who hadn’t breastfed either for a long period of time, or at all, that a their reasons stemmed from a lack of information and support on the matter.

So I’m gathering up shit-loads of no-nonsense, practical advice for anyone who might be interested, on the subject of breastfeeding.

Step in my good pal Sinead, mother to the most adorable, dainty princess Harlow. Sinead and I were due our babies on the exact same date – we were ‘Competitively Pregnant’, you know (they bleedin’ won) – so Eva and Harlow are almost the exact same age. I breastfed Eva for two months and switched to formula feeding. Sinead is still feeding Harlow breastmilk exclusively – but not with her boobs. I’ll let her explain in her own words.

Sharyn x

“I had my little one nearly 8 months ago and becoming a mum has been the most fulfilling thing I have ever done. But, like most mums, I have had my challenges.

I come from a family who are very supportive of breastfeeding and when I was pregnant I read everything I could find about it. I decided I really wanted to breastfeed my baby. I even YouTube’d how to get baby to latch on properly so that I would feel confident on our first try! I did what the advice said and when I had my baby I fed her immediately skin to skin. While in hospital my baby fed without difficulty, latching on well and no pain, I thought I had hit the jackpot,” what’s all the fuss about”??

Then, after 2 days, we went home. She started to scream…., and scream. She screamed the house down. I couldn’t get her to latch on in all the hysteria. Thankfully I remained calm, thinking “she can’t scream forever”….well, she gave it her best shot! This proceeded to happen every night, the sun would go down and BOOM, screaming! In the first few weeks my little one wanted to be on the boob around the clock. She might drift off after a few minutes on the boob, looking like a tiny cherub in my arms, but as soon as I would take her off the latch the hysteria would start again.

I slept in 30 minute intervals those first few weeks and felt like I was losing my mind with tiredness. During the day she was a lot more content so I’m sure people thought I was mad telling them just how hard it was.

Then I got mastitis – lovely. This is no joke ladies, not only is your boob really painful but you get the shakes and feel like you have the flu. Naturally, it just so happened I was on my own with Screamer all that day so couldn’t do what I needed to, which was rest. So I was carrying Screamer in my arms at the top of the stairs when the shakes got really bad and everything started to go fuzzy. I have never fainted before but it definitely was not the glamorous swoon I have seen on the telly. I just sort of lowered myself to the floor with Screamer tight against me and lay there, on the stairs until the fuzz ebbed away. I knew I couldn’t keep going as I was.

I really wanted breastfeeding to go well. I felt everyone would be terribly disappointed if I stopped, especially me. I knew all the health benefits of breastfeeding for both the baby and myself and felt I would be devastated to stop at that time. So, I rummaged out the little breast pump I had bought before Screamer’s arrival. I had bought it with the intention of using it on the odd occasion I would be away from Screamer. I had invested €125 in a Medela Swing which is a tiny electric pump, about the size of an old disc man. So anyway, on hideous mastitis day, baby was about 4 weeks old. I knew the best thing to do was clear the blockage in the painful boob and go the doctor. But, as I was on my own that day and too sick to leave the house, I just pumped until the infection cleared. Now, as you can imagine, this hard earned breastmilk was treasure, I couldn’t just bin it! With a little research I found you can refrigerate breastmilk for up to 5 days, so I kept it. That evening, I gave said bottle to Screamer, and something magical happened; Screamer slept. She slept for 3 hours straight. An absolute miracle, glorious. It meant I could get help. Every time prior to this that Screamer was, well, screaming, she was handed to me with “she needs the boob”, when in actuality, she didn’t always “need the boob”, she just needed someone to hold her and love her through the screaming. But I know it is hard to differentiate between crying due to hunger and crying for reassurance.

So anyway, that’s how I started pumping my milk, and how I felt I could continue breastfeeding and keep my sanity. Pumping might not be for everyone and I know breastfeeding your baby is best. It just is. No one can argue the facts. But this is how I got through. I consoled myself with the knowledge she was getting all the nutrients nature intended, but, selfishly, I gave her a bottle so I could get some sleep. It slowly went from one feed of pumped milk a day to solely pumped milk when Screamer was about 10 weeks old.

It took time for my body to get a routine established but now I pump 4 times a day. First when I wake up at 8.00 for 30 mins, then between 12.00 and 13.00 for 20 mins, then at about 17.00 and 22.00 for 15 minutes each. I found out you make the most milk in the morning, fascinating!

So there you have it, Screamer doesn’t scream anymore. She grew out of that at about 8 weeks. She is a very healthy and contented baby. Far more relaxed than her mother. I went back to work when she was 6 months old – I’m a nurse so I do long hours both night and day shifts and I still feed my baby solely breastmilk. To be honest, I am proud that we are still plodding along together pumping as we go but I still have guilt. That niggling in the back of my mind that she is not breastfed from the breast. I think mums put a lot of pressure on themselves. No one has ever said or done anything other than being totally supportive of my choice to pump but it’s me. This just happens to be the way I muddled through my first time being a mum.

No one ever gave me the option of pumping as just that, an option. I wrote this so that other mums might know that this is a viable option if you feel like you are banging your head against a brick wall breastfeeding a screamer. Pumping is a rarely discussed method of continuing to breastfeed with its health benefits included, while getting the positives of bottle feeding, like getting your other half to give you a hand the odd time. I don’t know how long we will keep going, but if I can do it, you can too.

 

 

Breastfeeding: A Pain In The Tits?

Firstly, let me say this: I am 100% a fan of breastfeeding our babies. And I am 100% a fan of bottle feeding our babies. Therefore, you might conclude that A) I have done both and B) I am taking my usual judgement-free stance on what other people do to feed their babies…and you’d be right.

But all the statistic waving on the subject of breastfeeding in Ireland of late is giving me, quite frankly, a large pain in my tits. Surely I am not the only person who realises that the real reason we have such low numbers of breastfeeding women in our country is because NO BODY TELLS US THE TRUTH ABOUT IT.

Newsflash: Breastfeeding Is Hard For Some People. Why won’t anyone just admit that to expectant mothers, instead of saying ‘Breast Is Best’ ad nauseum, without outlining the realities of how breastfeeding works? Wouldn’t our young mothers do better with realistic expectations, instead of believing it’s going to be all ‘babe-suckling-at-the-boob-by-the-candlelight’; only to become disheartened when the breastfeeding begins and it doesn’t follow what they’ve been told?

Nope, our health service continues to omit the relevant info, and leave our poor new mothers to fend for themselves when the new baby comes along. If you attend any of our maternity hospitals’ ante-natal classes when you are expecting a baby, you will most likely come away with the following (false) info:

1. If it’s your first baby, you’ll be overdue. You will know you are in labour when your waters break and you feel something like a period pain. Definitely stay at home for another two hours until the pain in unbearable before you come in to the hospital because we’re mad busy.

2. Don’t ask for the epidural until you have been in labour for hours and hours and hours. At the point that you do ask, it may or may not then be too late to actually get the epidural. And sure why would you want it anyway when you’ll have a quicker birth without it? (See Point 1: ‘We’re mad busy’).

3. Breastfeed your baby. It is the most natural thing in the world. Sure they do it in India.

Whisky. Tango. Foxtrot!

First thing off the cliff should be that statement ‘It’s the most natural thing in the world’, because it isn’t for lots of people. What breastfeeding needs is time and patience and support and a demo video of how to get your baby to the boob successfully in public. These are the logistical challenges that modern mothers should have the answers to.

If the Irish health service really wanted to increase the numbers of women breastfeeding in Ireland, I would suggest that they perhaps send all expectant mothers a pack called ‘The Truth About Breastfeeding’. The cover letter would read as follows:

‘Dear Mother-To-Be,

We hope you and baby are healthy and well. In the event that you choose to breastfeed your new baby boy or girl, we wanted to send you the following items out of the goodness of our hearts:

A nipple guard, some super-robust breast pads, nipple cream, a realistic schedule of when you should expect your baby to feed week by week, and when you should be resting your boobs and body, a demo of how to do it in public, a decent breast pump, a bottle and carton of instant formula for when you need it (and THAT’S OK), a list of non-arsehole-riddled coffee shops and restaurants where your baby can feed in peace, and a voucher for M&S so you can get fitted and buy yourself a nice new bra when the time comes that you stop breastfeeding.

Also, everything you decide is up to you.

Love, the Irish Health Service’

[Like this ranty madness? See more over at ‘Breastfeeding Is Back!’]

 

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Interview: Amazing Parent Pamela Cleary

Pamela and MArcEvery time I sit down to edit an interview in the Chitter Chatter series, I am reminded how great the world is and can be. This interview with Pamela Cleary says everything we need to know about being a parent – mix together the right amounts of love, worry, respect, acceptance and guidance with our kids and reap the benefits. Marc and Pamela’s relationship is closer than almost anyone else I’ve ever met and it’s a joy to see. Enjoy the video (dare you not to cry) x

 

 

RTE wants your bum (on their seats)

Hope everyone is well and struggling as much as I am with the ‘Do I detox my body of fat, or the house of leftover yummy food and booze? Body or house? Body or house?’ Fucking January…

At present, I am sort of dealing with it on a day-on, day-off basis – throwing the last of the Baileys down my throat one day (I confess to coercing Ass Monkey into being my co-conspirator by ACTUALLY saying ‘Look, it’s open now anyway – surely we can’t leave it on it’s own. What if it went off and we were responsible? I won’t have it on my conscience, Alan, I won’t’), and then feeling guilty and forcing everyone to eat pureed soup for 24 hours the next. Imbalanced much, MOI?!

In any case, Happy New Year. I hope, more than that your hoop fits or doesn’t fit into your favourite jeans, that your family and kids and YOURSELVES have a healthy and happy year. And I bleedin’ love yiz, right’??

Now. RTE are soon filming a new music and comedy show, hosted by the fabulous Dermot Whelan (Republic of Telly, Today FM). They are inviting the readers of RaisingIreland.com to come along as audience members for a fun evening out and most importantly THERE WILL BE FREE WINE! It films in RTE from 6.30 on the following dates: January 18th and 19th and February 1st/2nd/8th/9th and all you have to do is email them directly if you’d like to go along. All info below! x

‘Hey Ho Let’s go!’ is a brand new comedy music panel show on RTÉ Two television in Ireland. Presented by comedy impresario and air guitar fanatic Dermot Whelan, with two teams led by John Colleary, funny man and forgotten rockstar and Colin Murphy frustrated frontman and comic genius (their words not ours), this show is packed full of gags about gigs. How well do you know your musical trivia? Probably more than them!

Each week, they are joined by luminaries from the world of comedy and music – the perfect marriage of soundtrack and silliness as they go head to head to win the quiz – Hey Ho let’s go!

Would you like to be part of the Studio Audience?

Then please email us at studioaudience@moondog.co.uk for further information.

 

Guest Blogging at HerFamily.ie

It’s nice to get a little compliment now and then. I can vouch, as the primary caretaker of our two kiddos at home, that the full-time working Ass Monkey has never said ‘Hey, thanks so much for locating those socks we’ve been missing’ or ‘Wow, did you change the bins in the jacks? You’re amazing’.

We all do things so automatically and so regularly that it is simply what it is – just that thing we do that no one really notices. So when I had an email from Sive O’Brien at new super cool parenting website HerFamily.ie to say she’d been reading my l’il blog here and liked it…well, needless to say I cracked open that box of After Eights I’d been saving for a special occasion. When you write a blog, you’re never entirely sure that anyone is actually reading it (so yes, I actually just do it because I LIKE it. Unlike how I feel about cleaning the jacks).

HerFamily.ie launched this morning and I will be their guest blogger for the week. My first piece (i.e. gripe) is to remind you all that no, Ass Monkey still has not yet asked me to marry him, the consequences now being that I will some day probably have to walk up the aisle in similar fashion to this lady:

Uh-huh

Uh-huh

You can check out the full blog at: HerFamily.ie

Happy New Year, monkey faces x

A Letter To My Daughter Eva

10407523_10152510305736120_4705492640714526326_nWe had a Baby Naming Ceremony for Eva on Saturday, at The Unitarian Church at St. Stephen’s Green in Dublin. It’s a beautiful service, that concentrates solely on welcoming the child to the world, and leaves out all the religious stuff. ‘Coz Ass Monkey and I don’t dig the idea that babies are born with sin. Like, me hole.

I decided I would say a few words at the service, as Alan had done it for Jacob, and took to the good ol’ internet looking for inspiring poems or phrases that I could include. As is often the way, I got super sound advice from my mates on Facebook, who suggested that I pen my own letter to the gorgeous baby girl, as it would be a fab keepsake for her in years to come.

And so I did. It’s the easiest thing in the world to do, because you love them so much, and as a bonus, it can capture a snapshot of what is going on in the world at the time, how you feel about them, a little of the birth story, and even slag off your partner for TAKING HIS EFFING TIME when you went into labour ;o)

Here it is, enjoy, and thanks for the encouragement to do it!!

Sharyn x
Dear Eva,

On the night that I woke your dad at 1am to say that I felt you were on the way, you were already 9 days overdue. This is entirely my fault, as my mother informs me that I was born not one, not two, but THREE weeks overdue and have been late for every single moment of my life ever since! So that one, you have inherited from me.

After your dad finished his two sausage sandwiches (cough), we drove into the hospital and I remember turning onto the quays in Dublin City and remarking on how still the river was, and how pretty everything looked all lit up at night. At that same moment, you gave me a little kick & I knew that you were ok and we were going to get you into the world safe and sound.

Your dad and I were so overjoyed that we had a daughter that we cried and cried with happiness for hours. In fact, I carried on crying for a few weeks, any time I opened anything pretty and pink…. (hormones and happiness).

From the moment I met you, I said to everyone who would listen, ‘Look how strong she looks’. You were tough from Day 1; you had this sideward glance you gave us that said ‘Ok, whoever was in charge just got fired. I’m here now’. That one, you have inherited from your dad.

I have never seen your dad so in love as he is with you. He held you on the rocking chair for hours, every single evening for the first 12 weeks of your life when your little tummy pains kept you from sleep. I often attempt conversations with him now and watch his gaze drift off towards you, where he catches eyes with you and his whole face lights up. I would wager that Irish Water could call to the door, and so long as he’s happily distracted by you, he’d let them install TWO meters.

And your brother Jacob – well, he did ask for a long time where ‘Baby Brother’ was, but he has gotten very used to being the ‘best big brother in the world’ to his beautiful little sister. He is very kind and gentle with you, delighting in seeing if you’re awake every morning so that he can say ‘Hi, Poo Head!’ After we brought you home, he would introduce you to visitors by only giving them your full name. But as he couldn’t pronounce ‘Elizabeth’, he used to call you ‘Eva A Little Bit’. And we think that really suits.

So to Eva A Little Bit – welcome to our family and our hearts. M’iníon, mo ghrí, mo chroí.

Love from mum xxx 

PS: We spelled it EVA but pronounced it AVA, on purpose. You’re welcome ;o)

[Did you read ‘Mammy, Do You Have A Willy?!’ yet]

 

My Whore Voice

I don’t know about you, but when I became a mum, I started to freak out about money. I literally ping-ponged from ‘Happy to do a comedy gig for €50 and a packet of fizzy cola bottles’, to ‘I must come up with the BEST INVENTION EVER so that my kids think I’m amazingly cool AND I have enough money to buy their future shit boyfriends or girlfriends out of our lives forever.

So, in no particular order, in the last three years, I have sought employment in the following areas:

  1. Beauty Therapist. Yes, I went to ACTUAL CLASSES to learn how to spray a perfectly decent body to a Kim Kardashian orange and the likes. Thankfully, I was pretty shit at all of that.
  2.  Web Genius. I’ve had a comedy website, a personal website, and now a parenting website. I nearly did a course in web design. I 100% thought that I would get instant advertising and make a mint in the first 12 months. WHAT IS WRONG WITH MY BRAIN?
  3. A Stand Up Comedian. The biggest mistake I made after I had Jacob was trying to do stand up as ‘Sharyn Hayden’ instead of the wonderful Shazwanda, which had always worked far better. The thinking behind it was that if I could break my vagina by having a kid, then I could do fucking anything…. …. ….. ….. I WAS WRONG.
  4. A Theatre Actress. Acting on stage is a joy, an absolute joy, but when you have a toddler who counts on your to put them to bed and you have to leave for work at 5pm for Show Week, you will pay for that one week of joy for the following FOUR weeks, as your kid punishes you for abandoning them by refusing to go to creche, staying up all night, and catching the stomach flu. Also, theatre pays fuck all. Go get a day’s extra work on Vikings and you’d be better off.
  5. International Best Selling Author. ‘Sure, it couldn’t be hard, could it?’ Those were actual words that came from my mouth as I sat down to pen my first novel. Being a writer is a bit of a curse when you have kids, because you rarely get a chance to write, and then you feel terribly frustrated that you can’t get your ideas out and onto the page and then you take it out on your fella coz he has a real job… maybe I’ve said too much ;o)

So now! My latest carry on is voiceover work! The gorgeous Deborah at Windmill Lane recording studios arranged for me to record my voiceover demo and I had a BALL doing it. You’d buy a buggy off me in Mothercare…wouldn’t you?!!

Click below to hear it, and check out my whore voice in the first ad! x

Review: ‘Becoming Mum’ by Kate Carbery

Becoming-Mum-webI have had ‘Becoming Mum’ in my handbag for ages, hoping to get around to it one of these days ‘before the baby comes/when we get settled with the baby/when I get this freezer stocked/when Hallowe’en is over/when it’s still 2104’.

I finally opened it and read the first page just a week ago, and devoured it because it’s so good. I’m only sorry I didn’t get around to it sooner!

What Kate Carberry has done is brilliant – she has interviewed loads of women (and some men!) about their experiences of becoming parents. It is divided into those really important categories that everyone talks about or has questions about if they are, or are about to, become parents:

1. The Birth

2. Your body post-birth

3. Mum & Baby’s First Days

4. Feeding

5. Visitors

6. Inside your head – post birth

7. Public Health Visitor

8. Your relationship

9. Routines

10. Tiredness

Each chapter has several genuine first-hand accounts from these interviewed parents about their experiences and they are capped off with a few pointers of advice at the end of each section. As a no-bullshit individual, I can hand-on-heart say that the pointers are really not pushy one way or the other, are practical and sound.

‘Becoming Mum’ is really fantastic and is a must-buy for any lady who is expecting a baby. You can buy it online via the Liberties Press Website xxx